The one where I absolutely did not panic, honest.
This week I tell the story of the time my daughter went missing after returning from a school trip. What should have been a straightforward coach pickup somehow turned into nearly two hours of confusion, panic, teachers searching the school grounds, and me driving around trying to work out where she'd gone.
The strangest part is that nobody had actually done anything wrong.
We were looking for her. She was looking for us. Somehow we still managed to completely miss each other.
-----
Thanks for listening. Genuinely. You could’ve been doing literally anything else.
If you’d like more of me, head to heyitsdiggy.com. There’s a blog, links to my socials, and the general digital clutter you’ve come to expect.
If you prefer to read your podcasts there is a full transcript of every episode on the blog.
Got feedback, a question, or a burning need to correct me? The best way to do that is via the form.
Transcript
Hey, it's Diggy.
Speaker A:Today I'm going to tell you the story about how we lost my daughter on a school trip.
Speaker A:And it is kind of as harrowing as it sounds.
Speaker A:She did actually go missing.
Speaker A:She was gone for about an hour and a half, creeping up to two hours.
Speaker A:And it was, it was a difficult time because there was a point where I genuinely thought something had happened to her.
Speaker A:Now obviously I'm recording this.
Speaker A:So she turned up, it was fine.
Speaker A:It all turned out to be absolutely fine.
Speaker A:But let's go back to the beginning.
Speaker A:Beginning.
Speaker A:So she's gone on a school trip.
Speaker A:And this school trip is one of those, we used to call it PGL when I was a kid.
Speaker A:It's where you went and did adventure stuff, you know, like abseiling, quad biking, zorbing, all that kind of stuff.
Speaker A:I don't, I don't, I don't know exactly what they do on them these days, but I know she did quite a few of those types of things.
Speaker A:And it was, it was a three day trip.
Speaker A:So she was gone for three days.
Speaker A:She's been away before, once before with primary school and this was with high school.
Speaker A:So this was a bit more high stakes in terms of.
Speaker A:It was very much a they go away, there's no contact unless obviously there's an emergency.
Speaker A:And she was also going with people that she doesn't know because she doesn't know many of the people in her school at this point.
Speaker A:So she went, she went on this trip.
Speaker A:The trip was fine when it came to coming back from the trip.
Speaker A:So we told her one of the things was they weren't allowed to take their phones with them.
Speaker A:So that meant we didn't have a way of tracking her with her phone.
Speaker A:Not that we track her, but you know what I mean, we didn't have a way of finding out where she is when she came back and she didn't have her keys with her because she was worried about losing them.
Speaker A:And obviously we were going to pick her up from the trip.
Speaker A:It was my day off anyway.
Speaker A:My wife had got out of work, work early.
Speaker A:We were both looking forward to seeing her when she comes back from said trip.
Speaker A:So I arrive early because, well, it's terrible parking around the school so I wanted to make sure I got close enough to get a parking space.
Speaker A:And all of the places where you would ordinarily park have been cordoned off for the two coaches that are coming back.
Speaker A:So we're not allowed to park in those places.
Speaker A:So that made it even worse and it Was school letting out time as well.
Speaker A:They didn't even think of planning it so that they'd be coming out at a different time, because that would be too sensible, wouldn't it?
Speaker A:And so I arrives and there's absolutely nowhere to park, so I ended up having to park about three streets away.
Speaker A:What I did, I. I parked up and I was half an hour early at this point.
Speaker A:So I parked up, watched a few videos on my phone, you know, like on YouTube, like you do when you're trying to pass time.
Speaker A:And then we got a message from school saying we're running a little bit late.
Speaker A:We're probably going to arrive at about quarter past three.
Speaker A:And we were expecting them at three.
Speaker A:Not a problem, right?
Speaker A:That's okay.
Speaker A:It's not a problem at all.
Speaker A:They come out of school at five past three, so if anything, that helped get rid of some of the others before the coaches arrived.
Speaker A:So actually might have been not a bad thing.
Speaker A:My wife was finishing work at 3 and I saw her walk down past the street where I was on, because I'm parked on the street that's quite near hers where she works.
Speaker A:So I rang her and I said, do me a favor, when you get there, have a quick look to see if there's any parking spaces.
Speaker A:If there is, ring me and I'll come and park up over there.
Speaker A:If there isn't, ring me anyway and I'll walk over so that I'm there when the coach arrives.
Speaker A:And she said, yep, okay, five minutes pass.
Speaker A:She should have been there at this point.
Speaker A:Like, it was like a minute's walk away.
Speaker A:So five minutes pass.
Speaker A:And I'm like, where is she?
Speaker A:So I rang her again and I said.
Speaker A:She said, hey.
Speaker A:I went, hi.
Speaker A:I said, is there a parking space or not?
Speaker A:She said, they're already here.
Speaker A:So I was like, all right, okay, fine, I'll just walk then.
Speaker A:Like, I given up.
Speaker A:I've given up trying to find out if there was a parking space at this point.
Speaker A:So I said, I'll just walk, then I'll meet you there in a minute because she's going to need help with a.
Speaker A:With a case and whatnot.
Speaker A:So I jumps out, the car, starts walking over, walking pretty fast, because I wanted to be there as she was coming off the coach.
Speaker A:I just assumed she meant the coaches were just pulling up.
Speaker A:The way the school is, there's like a gill that runs between the school and the houses next to it that gets you between two main roads.
Speaker A:I'm sort of parked on the first main road and she.
Speaker A:They get off the coach on the second main road, and the second main road is the one that we would usually park on, which is technically the back of the school, but that's where everybody enters from, from the back.
Speaker A:So I'm walking through this ginnel and my wife comes walking back towards me.
Speaker A:I said, oh, yeah.
Speaker A:She went, she's not there.
Speaker A:I went, what do you mean she's not there?
Speaker A:She said, she's.
Speaker A:She's not going off the coach, so.
Speaker A:Well, have you gone on the coach to ask her to get off the coach?
Speaker A:She's like, no.
Speaker A:I mean, she wasn't on the coach.
Speaker A:I saw them all getting off the coach and she wasn't on it.
Speaker A:So, like, oh, that doesn't sound right.
Speaker A:So she said, well, has she come this way?
Speaker A:I said, no, she's not come this way.
Speaker A:I said, and I don't think she would come this way as well.
Speaker A:This is not where she usually would go.
Speaker A:She knows if I'm gonna pick her up, which is.
Speaker A:Which was the thing we told her, we will.
Speaker A:I will pick you up.
Speaker A:She knows when I'm picking her up, I'm always on road number two.
Speaker A:But she does walk quite far down the road because it's a.
Speaker A:It's a pretty long road.
Speaker A:And she probably.
Speaker A:Sometimes I have to park, say, 100 to 200 yards down the road in order to be.
Speaker A:Well, in order to get a parking space.
Speaker A:And my wife obviously doesn't know that because she doesn't drive.
Speaker A:And she isn't normally the one picking her up at school in this way, but she normally.
Speaker A:If my wife's picking her up, well, she probably doesn't, to be honest.
Speaker A:She walks home herself at that point.
Speaker A:My daughter, because that's just easier for her.
Speaker A:But if she.
Speaker A:For some reason she needs to see my mum, she'll just walk across the road to where she works.
Speaker A:So she went, oh, right, maybe she's down there then.
Speaker A:So I was like, well, you just said she didn't get off the bus.
Speaker A:She said, well, they were already here when I got there.
Speaker A:So I saw the last of them coming off the bus.
Speaker A:I'm like, oh, right.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:So, okay.
Speaker A:So I goes down.
Speaker A:I said, well, I'll run down there because I know where should.
Speaker A:Where, like, how far she would go.
Speaker A:So I went all the way down to the end of this street and she's not there.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:So I'm like, oh, okay, okay.
Speaker A:This is a bit unusual.
Speaker A:So I went back and sure enough, we've not seen her.
Speaker A:My wife's on the coach, trying to see if she's still on the coach, and she's just not gone off.
Speaker A:None of the people around the coach could remember seeing her.
Speaker A:So there's other students.
Speaker A:They were like, yeah, we don't remember seeing to get off the coach and the drive, you know, we described it to the driver.
Speaker A:We said, she's got a unicorn on her suitcase.
Speaker A:Anyway.
Speaker A:Oh, yeah, I do remember a unicorn.
Speaker A:Suitcase.
Speaker A:Suitcase.
Speaker A:I remember putting it on.
Speaker A:I don't remember taking it off.
Speaker A:So we're like, okay, none of this is sounding great.
Speaker A:So we decided to go back to road number one, just in case she's realized that traffic's busy on the other side and thought, maybe they're on the other side or she's gone, they're not here.
Speaker A:I'll go the other way.
Speaker A:So we walked back to road number one.
Speaker A:She's not there at this point.
Speaker A:We saw one of her teachers and she said, are you all right?
Speaker A:We're like, yeah, we're trying to find Fina.
Speaker A:And she said, oh, have you not got her?
Speaker A:It's like, no, we've not got her.
Speaker A:We're trying to find her.
Speaker A:Obviously, I wouldn't have said that otherwise, would I?
Speaker A:And she said, oh, you know, come sit, think of it.
Speaker A:I don't remember seeing her since we arrived.
Speaker A:I'm like, that's not a thing you say.
Speaker A:That's not a thing you say to the parents.
Speaker A:And I went, oh, well, that's not filling me with confidence, is it?
Speaker A:And she said, we did, you know, we did tie you to a tree this morning.
Speaker A:So maybe she's still tied to that tree.
Speaker A:And I'm like, that is definitely not what you say.
Speaker A:Obviously, they've not left her tied to a tree, but why would you make a joke about it at this point?
Speaker A:It's been 20 minutes to half an hour and we've not been able to find her.
Speaker A:And nobody recalls seeing her.
Speaker A:She says, oh, I probably shouldn't joke about it.
Speaker A:Actually should.
Speaker A:I'm like, no, you shouldn't.
Speaker A:And she saw.
Speaker A:She's like, well, I'll go and see.
Speaker A:I'll go and see if she's in the school.
Speaker A:So she disappears into school.
Speaker A:In the meantime, all we can do is stand there and wait.
Speaker A:We're sort of between us.
Speaker A:Kept going between road A and Road B, Road 1 and Road 2, whatever.
Speaker A:I called them to see if we could see her.
Speaker A:And then eventually this teacher came out after being inside the school for, like, 20 minutes.
Speaker A:And she said, no, she's definitely not in the school.
Speaker A:We've got teachers posted throughout the school.
Speaker A:She's not in.
Speaker A:I've got everybody looking for her and nobody's finding her.
Speaker A:And she's got a ra.
Speaker A:They've got radios out at this point and there's teachers walking around everywhere and they're going down all the streets.
Speaker A:So I thought.
Speaker A:So I said, maybe she's.
Speaker A:Because the place where I'd parked is somewhere where I would normally say to her.
Speaker A:I couldn't find a parking space, I'm in this spot and she'd know where to go.
Speaker A:So I thought maybe she's over there.
Speaker A:So I walk back over there and she's not there.
Speaker A:So I goes back to the school.
Speaker A:We're walking around the school.
Speaker A:Everybody's out looking for her.
Speaker A:There's other parents now looking for her.
Speaker A:At this point, we're showing photos of her around to everybody.
Speaker A:We obviously couldn't phone her because she didn't have a phone.
Speaker A:We couldn't find her based on her little tracking tag she has on her keys because she didn't have her keys.
Speaker A:She has one in a bag as well.
Speaker A:We didn't have that because she didn't have a school bag with us.
Speaker A:She only had a suitcase.
Speaker A:By this point, it's been an hour and 10 minutes.
Speaker A:And my wife said, well, maybe she's just gone home.
Speaker A:And I said, well, that is possible.
Speaker A:However, if she'd have just gone home, she'd have appeared on the ring doorbell by now because it only takes like 20 minutes to get home.
Speaker A:She'd have done that ages ago.
Speaker A:And I've obviously been checking the doorbell to see if she's been.
Speaker A:I've had it on live for you pretty much the whole time.
Speaker A:And the door hasn't gone, so she's not got home.
Speaker A:Also, she hasn't got a key to get in.
Speaker A:So she.
Speaker A:Why would she go home?
Speaker A:But then I'm thinking, well, maybe she would, who knows?
Speaker A:Like, you don't.
Speaker A:You don't know what she's thinking or why she's done it.
Speaker A:So we carries on looking.
Speaker A:We get, you know, we're walking around everywhere, looking at the end of the roads.
Speaker A:It gets to a point where I'm like, well, the only thing I can do at this point is go and try and maybe drive towards home the way she would walk and see if I can find her that way.
Speaker A:Maybe she's just walked quite a long way.
Speaker A:And I was panicking at this point thinking, you know, some of that because there's been quite A few incidents recently in the area with kids on the way home from school.
Speaker A:There's been a few people been attacked by other kids from a different school.
Speaker A:And there's also been some guy apparently driving around in a van.
Speaker A:I mean, I don't know how much of that is true, but they keep sending messages about it saying look out for this van, blah blah, blah, you know, that kind of stuff.
Speaker A:So you know, you're thinking what if at that point.
Speaker A:And we, I was thinking what if?
Speaker A:My wife must have been thinking what if?
Speaker A:But I was trying to portray an outward approach of now be fine, don't worry, she's fine.
Speaker A:I even at one point I even said, you know what?
Speaker A:Nothing bad could have happened to her because I pity anybody that tries to grab our fina and take her because she gauged her eyes out.
Speaker A:She, she's not a, she's not a sit back and take it lying down kind of person.
Speaker A:She would absolutely batter them.
Speaker A:But it's easy to think that, isn't it?
Speaker A:You know, you don't, you don't know what really would happen in that sort of situation.
Speaker A:You know, just saying.
Speaker A:When she was in primary school she had a bit of a reputation for being a hard nut, but she has calmed down since, so who knows.
Speaker A:So you know, I'm like, I'm going to go get in the car and start driving around.
Speaker A:Maybe for some crazy reason she's decided to walk.
Speaker A:She's not remembered the instruction, right, that we're picking her up and she's gone somewhere else.
Speaker A:My wife went back to her work in case she'd gone there, she hadn't gone there.
Speaker A:So I gets in the car, I'm driving along and I'm thinking, I don't know why I'm driving, like I don't know where I'm gonna drive because I don't actually know which way she walks.
Speaker A:There's so many different ways she could go and she goes a different way depending on which friend she's with.
Speaker A:As I'm driving along, I, I turns at the top of a road to go down the, like a main road through, through the town.
Speaker A:And in the distance I could see what looked like a little girl draggin suitcase along.
Speaker A:And I'm like, I think that's her.
Speaker A:And I put my foot down, I'm storming down the road.
Speaker A:And as I got closer and closer I started to realize that the picture on the suitcase was resembling more and more a unicorn by the minute.
Speaker A:And the shape was starting to look more and more feeder Shaped.
Speaker A:And I saw her, and I was like, thank God.
Speaker A:And I pull up.
Speaker A:I drove up right at the side of her.
Speaker A:I w. My windows down.
Speaker A:It was a red hot, scorching day.
Speaker A:Anyway, so all the windows were down, and I went f. And she.
Speaker A:She looked up and she.
Speaker A:She was hoofing this suitcase down the road.
Speaker A:She looked like just.
Speaker A:She.
Speaker A:Like she'd been on an expedition and she's even.
Speaker A:And she looked up and she smiled at me.
Speaker A:She went, hey, Dad.
Speaker A:I slammed the brakes on.
Speaker A:On the car skidded in the middle of the road.
Speaker A:I'm just in the middle of a main road, Gets out the car runs over, put my arms around her, and she went, what's wrong?
Speaker A:The cars behind me are all honking the horns.
Speaker A:I picked her up.
Speaker A:I just literally scooped her up, walked over to the car, threw her in the back, like, just went, get in.
Speaker A:Threw her in the back, Went back and got the suitcase and threw it back in the boot of the car and jumped in the car and drove off, right?
Speaker A:It must have looked like I was kidnapping her to everybody else.
Speaker A:And I was like, we've been looking for you everywhere.
Speaker A:I went.
Speaker A:Give me a minute.
Speaker A:And I said, you know, hey, virtual assistant, please call my wife.
Speaker A:And it did.
Speaker A:And I was like, I've got her.
Speaker A:I've got her.
Speaker A:She was walking home.
Speaker A:I'm on my way back to you now.
Speaker A:And she's like, oh, thank God.
Speaker A:So I put the phone down and I'm like, what happened?
Speaker A:She said, well, I got off the coach and there was nobody there.
Speaker A:So I walked to the end of the road where you usually park, and there was.
Speaker A:And I sat there for about two or three minutes and nobody was there.
Speaker A:So I figured something had happened and you just couldn't get in touch with me to let me know.
Speaker A:So I just decided to walk home.
Speaker A:Like, oh, my God, like, what?
Speaker A:So it turns out after.
Speaker A:After, like we'd all calmed down and we're talking to her.
Speaker A:She was the first one off the coach, and she had a suitcase with her.
Speaker A:She'd kept it with her on the coach instead of checking it in the.
Speaker A:In the under thing.
Speaker A:Luggage.
Speaker A:So she got off the coach first.
Speaker A:She probably got off the coach, walked the giddle, as my wife was walking out of the giddle.
Speaker A:And then she walked in the end of the road, and she got to the point where usually sort of the furthest away I would be parked.
Speaker A:She said, just sat on my suitcase there.
Speaker A:I think it was about half an hour.
Speaker A:So the whole time we were looking for her for that first part.
Speaker A:She was sat right at the end of the road waiting for us.
Speaker A:And then she just gave up or decided to walk home.
Speaker A:I was like, oh, my God.
Speaker A:I was like, how were you going to get in the house?
Speaker A:She said, well, I was just going to sit there and wait till you got home.
Speaker A:Because I knew if I went to the doorbell, I'd be able to press it and you'd be able to tell me where you are if you weren't there.
Speaker A:Like, ah, it's actually really thinking.
Speaker A:And I'm dead proud that she didn't panic when we weren't there and she just used a noggin and thought, you know what?
Speaker A:I'll go home.
Speaker A:I'll go.
Speaker A:I'll just make my own way home.
Speaker A:Because she does that anyway normally.
Speaker A:But she didn't.
Speaker A:She didn't freak out or anything.
Speaker A:Even when she saw me, she wasn't like, where were you?
Speaker A:Why didn't you turn up?
Speaker A:She was just like, yeah, I just figured something had happened and you didn't have time and you couldn't come and pick me up.
Speaker A:Like, dude, that was.
Speaker A:It was intense.
Speaker A:It was very intense.
Speaker A:Like, you ever wonder how you'd feel if something happened to your child and they went missing or something like that?
Speaker A:And I absolutely, really think I. I found out that.
Speaker A:And I was terrified as much as I don't.
Speaker A:I didn't want to admit it at the time.
Speaker A:I was absolutely terrified that something had happened to her.
Speaker A:Anyway, it all turned out well in the end.
Speaker A:See you next time.
